The Reason / Remembrance

I remember you. The only words I can find since you left this world. Many details about you I will never know but, what I do know is the kindness you showed to me. You spoke about God often. The days we’d spend talking about Heaven being a grand tavern hosting an eternal festival. You gave the sunshine a purpose as a blessing light. I feel blessed by the light even now.

Can you feel your kindness carry on inside of me? I’ll give it to others like you did for me. If the world uses kindness then everyone might one day be blessed by the sunshine you showed me. Others don’t understand why I live the way I do. I know you wouldn’t question or disrespect my life choices.

They can think whatever they want as long as I keep going with a smile. When the going gets tough I get tougher but not until then. Preparing for the inevitable will never be my way to live because I understand life. Thank you for giving me the light I needed on the inside.

Let me be the radiance of God’s love. Maybe not the god you knew but the combined existence of everything. I’ll radiate the kindness you, a shard of God, taught me.
sa;bdry

Scarlet and Cyan Lines

Scarlet lines decorating the marble floor
When the eyes come out, the blind kin.
What they’ll tell you is naught but sin
Disguised. Just show them the door.

If you listen you’ll die before God comes
To rip every sinful fiber from your damned body.

What remains? Are you nothing but darkness?
Shadows casting where the throne sits;
Your heart of thorns must burn and to ash!
I called you a friend but you never could be.
You could never be me. The truth will slash
Through every lie ever made. Take hits
Until you feel fear inside absolute hopelessness.

But truthfully there is just us. God and the Devil
Get you second after me. Every lie you speak
Condemns you. Others will let you be. Not I.
Who told you it was alright to hurt others?
Not any god, not any man with a good heart;
By listening to the teachings of bad, evil men.
How could you have known what evil was
When evil is the norm? Greed is the true sin.

Please take what you need and stop, moderation.
We will find ourselves cleaner at the destination.

An army doesn’t scare me. Fill me with lead
If you must but more will rise to rebel. Eternal
Radiance will break through these long shadows.

Cyan lines trail down the cheeks of the loving kind
Who still believe in Humanity. We never fall behind,
We help those in need, we sacrifice our lives
For others, and we care. So put down the knives.

I’ll step in when you can no longer back down. . .
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The Human Epic: Part I ~ Of Elysium and Inferno

The sands, they shift as a legend now rises
To enshadow these dunes with wild wishes.

These black marble walls reflect the heat and light
Creating a certain hell called the Tower of Night.

People walk in the shade the tower casts.
They saw the shade as a heaven that lasts.

I never did. I watched them from afar with curious eyes
Wondering why. Why is it that everything someday dies?

Their honest worship of celestial and manmade deities
Left a bitter taste in my mouth with such strong enmities.

I knew better. Some people take to beliefs with violence
While others use kindness. Neither side will use silence.

They aren’t viceful or virtuous just a little belligerent.
Science and faith, trying to make sense of the divergent.
fire_ice_clouds

The Selfish Bastard I Am

Walk back down the road, tell me that
And I’ll do it. Here I stand with myself
Believing I will always prevail. A shelf
Isn’t the place for a life, but why this hate?

Did I not always have my lofty, unrealistic aims?
I tried living without them and felt dead. I’m sorry.

If everything came to a choice;
Could you accept what I decide?
I’d set off seeking more in this life
Unaware of what’s in front of me.
I’m blind to the simple things,
Left stumbling into the unknown.

Where did I go wrong? Rejoice,
I’ll walk without thoughts of suicide
Chaffing my ankles. Take a knife
And snap the binds. Are we the same?
The pain returns and stings
Like a fresh wound unknown.

I should’ve said the truth; my world is full of suffering
And I’m trying my best to carry on. I find me stuttering
When talking you. I want to shelter you from my differing
Point of view because the night is eternal with no returning.

And here you remain like a stain I can’t wash out.
Will you be the rain and clean the heart I cannot.


“Maybe I’m being selfish. We are going through our own suffering that shakes our foundations. I’m trying to drown out of my pain and see you clearly. These visions of scarlet and cyan lead me away from the truth. Tripping over myself when I run to you. Selfish are my ways but you make me want to be better. I’ll learn from these shortcomings and become the man you always deserved. In the end this love may come undone and I accept that the best I can, yet; I continue forward with the teaching life gives.”

The Primal Truth

The forest holds something I try
To forget. I know others will pry
And discover what makes me cry.

Watching civilization blossom on Earth;
Different ideology, same methodology.
I seek peace and that’s why I took a walk
Into the forest. Early in the cool morning
When the light starts bending through
I set off with no true destination just to go.

An animal that is afraid to be free and in chains
Must tread through these many existential rains.

Would I find solace in a palace?
Would I find happiness in silence?
Would I find myself in my decadence?

“Erase what I’ve seen it burns deeply inside.
I see the kindness and the numbness reside
In many hearts. But I feel like I need to make
A choice between change and what’s at stake.”

The forest holds onto the truth
That wants to be remembered:
Life remains when society falls.
falcon

Lost in the Sea of Self

Slumbering memories sinking under
The waves of existence. When I awake
Will anything remain of what I knew?

A canvas bleeding light and darkness
Until every inch is changed. Calmness
Washes over as I remember tenderness
I could never find but it rests in nothingness.

From the Sea of Self new life will awaken.
I’m but a single thread caught between.

Walking through the lonesome shallows
Where shadows haunt. I feel my heart race
As they remember something that we erase
Along the way. They ready the gallows.

Screaming, lashing; I’m dragged before the noose.
A rope made of the falsities my memories release
Dangles from the smog in the air. Of all the things
Given and taken by me the sentence seems right
For a thief. On the platform a lonely crow sings
Like a tragic form of catharsis. The rope is loose
And I look around to see no one. I hear a noise.

A great storm roars from not far. Nowhere to run
I fall on my knees and tears crash straight down.

“When everything comes undone will you stand or run?”
sa;bdry

Learning to Relax

A grand circus, the dark home of the Liar King,
Thriving like a parasite on the last lights of Eden.
The jesters dancing around primordial flames
But in their eyes is death. And he who tames
Lions has no control over their hunger. Laden
Truth with frightful joys and let humanity sing.

Lights shining on the horizon of the night sky
Tempting pure hearts that have been wading in sludge.
With rain the blood and lust overflow from cisterns
Into the wound of existence, infection of innocence.

Would you run to safety if only you could?

Fleeing into the brier coffin of tears never shed
By men too dark to be saved. The flood erased
Much of what couldn’t grow in the Sun. Were you led
Towards the light or a lie deep inside your head?

If we’d question the truth we’ll find cracks.
Observation and salvation, a petri dish
Growing a colony of lies. Still we wish
To be worthy. How rusted are these tracks?

Continually dragging corpses across the border
Between right and wrong as we try to find order.

I can’t say I really care about that balance.
It’s hard to dream when we can’t ever agree
On what it means to be alive. Does a tree
Forsake itself for growing? Cast a glance:

The Earth is slowly revolving
And on it life remains evolving.
sa;bdry

The Lotuses of Hades

Where are you? When the world burns
Your tender flesh. Still the world turns
And we move along chasing these Suns.

Caught in a facade, spiraling illusion,
Where memories fade. The waters of Lethe
Can’t compare to what we drink. Heavy
Is the burden as we give into erosion.

Yeah, cruelty and sorrow exist
But I’m begging you to resist.

I’ve spent my time in the rivers of Hades,
Steams of consciousness, to ponder life.
The truth I found haunts me like a ghost
In the dark. Nothing safe, nothing right;
Cerberus’s teeth ripping flesh from bone.

Five rivers – I will descend into darkness once again
If you ever lose your way home, the love we retain.
heart-on-fire

Timelines, Pathways of the Heart

Across the strings of time memories are knots
That come undone. Prove to me you’ll remain
When the start and the end are pulled. A stain
Of red wine on white silk where the string rots.

Electrical waves, your heart beat echoing
In my eardrums a reverberation. Oh, sing.

Eternalize my gaze with a knife of romance;
Touch the point to my iris and tell me the truth.
Come or go, we come undone in unusual ways
Leaving a fissure. Hey, don’t worry my friend,
This is room to grow. Break these ancient chains
To a beast within beyond the Gardens of Babylon.

Shatter the cross-hair and push me back
Along the timeline that brought me here.
I hold to the love inside though I lack
Much strength. I’ll wipe away every tear.

Right or wrong? That isn’t what brought us together.
A string of choices led us near each other. When I saw
You suffering alone I chose to hold you as you tremble.
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Narcistheism: The Antithesis of Compassion

A torn, dead parasol caught in callous winds
Without escape. A terrible event this reminds.

Achilles, warrior of the Iliad, with a heart
Swelling with grief fell from the grace
Of his old ways. Around Troy trace
The lust of revenge, vengeance, to start.

Chasing understanding in a war torn reality
Keeps us from living. Fear of brutality
Leaves a chink in our armor strong.
I know it wasn’t a matter of right or wrong.
First to violence survives in the end
But there’s no life to live in pretend.

Did either Achilles or Hector survive?
Walking separate paths to a funeral blaze,
Stuck behind the jaws of Cerberus forever.
What did it prove?

Today we sit on Mt. Olympus
Casting judgment from thrones.
A shifted paradigm of the opus
Called Humanity. The divines
Who never see thorns on roses.

We still have miles to crawl on uneven cobblestones.
The path is uncertain; will we see before we turn to bones?
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