The River Calls Out

Roaring rapids permeate the forest’s tranquility.
A sense of adventure entices me to seek
And witness true beauty. It’s hidden behind
The veil of this world, so far from greedy hands.

I wander the forest called Earth where souls
Planted like seeds take root and flourish.
Something beautiful is beyond the selfish
Nature residing within a young soul’s shoals.

One day a hurricane will decimate this internal facade.
Least that’s what we hope for someday before we fade.

Some souls scared me but I stared into the darkness
Without looking back. It resides in us all. I won’t run away.
To accept it is to move forward, to deny it is to fall back;
Let the truth wash you in uncertainty and drown you.

I keep on following a path through the selfish and selfless,
The sinful, believing that the journey will be worth it someday.
It has been. I have felt hurt and I have failed to find my own way
Inside the forest. A thunderous sound calls. The river is restless.

I’ll drink deep the clear untainted waters, scream out my lungs; wake
From the nightmare slumber and shiver in the bitter truth we make.

The heart and mind, idealistic and realistic. . .a helix soul.

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Crystal Waterfalls by AnnaArmona

The King of Dust and Dreams

A curse of dignity cast by accidental probability.
Circumstantial fall from grand castle eaves, grace,
Where the pages of stories find themselves written.
I’m not a real king for I oversee this false kingdom.

The real world continues forward without me there.
I chase dreams no matter who won’t remain near.

A life spent writing, finding love, and just having fun.
How long will the facade stand? I sink into the waters
Born from existence, a breath and a vision. In tatters
I get stronger believing I can survive, turning the gun.

I thought I’d be the one falling but here I find myself
Afraid like a wild animal trapped. I will not die today.
Not a king or a man, the design of society rejects me.

My heart’s good. That I swear. I won’t ever let others
Tell me that the path I walk has no structure or merit.
The King of Dreams delves into the unseen. Hear it.
My heart beating to scream that I’m alive. Us lovers. . .

Us lovers that history will forget. Doesn’t that scare me away
From the truth? No. I continue living with my own price to pay.

The truth is that I was meant to live even when I don’t know why.
A war called existence greedily plucks at my stiff heartstrings
And the most exquisite music fills the empty corridors of my
Heart. We all will walk toward a dream that like a bell rings.

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To exist but to never be. . .

The Answer

The stars they fall into the darkness one by one.
Nothingness echoes from the reliquary of life
Across dimensions forged by time and space.

Standing at a hilltop I remember the light
Shining upon pastures of green. That night
Never ends. All the people safe in their homes
Have their simple, beautiful lives. Tomorrow comes.

I thought that they were all fools but I understand
The love of simple things as I reach out my hand.

Will anyone grab my hand before I drift away among the cosmos?
No wings but these eyes of mine capture the dying light of distant stars.
Stuck in orbit I want to drift endlessly with glittering eyes reflecting
Everything ten-fold. I aim to be extraordinary like a shooting star
People wish on as it crosses the horizon from this lonely hilltop.

Take this hand and move me into your glorious orbit. In your arms
I feel safe. Where are we heading? Your glance pierces and disarms.

At the right time everything came together making this single moment.
Is this fate, divine intervention, or chance? All three routes converge
Into one. No answer to be found because the answer is known as life.

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Before I drift away among the cosmos. . .

 

Righteous & Blind (The Human Condition)

I cross a foggy valley full of forgotten terrors without fear.
Vines lace the cliffs; mindless beasts wander; the fog
Obscures my sight. Every breath lulls me toward madness
But I keep my feet moving. I selfishly cling to my own life.

When the path is unknown what else can be done?
Step by step, risk by risk; I’m striving to atone
For the promises I couldn’t keep. I’m not set in stone.

Terrible things lunge at me and I stay calm as I fight through.
Fear would leave me for dead like everyone who came before.
I won’t be another tombstone laid in the ground. If I wash ashore
From this Hell who would say that the sky will remain blue?

Everyone is familiar with gray clouds and stormy weather.
The sky remains blue behind all the curtains in the theater!

What does it matter where I’ve been? It’s about where I’m heading.
Every deep valley finds me blind as I reach for the memories,
A blue sky with clouds slowly drifting by. Nothing will ever stop me.

I’m one of the terrors that reside here. Selfishly reaching for the light
No matter the cost, chasing a dream that’s been so long out of sight.

Twin Stars (Your Gravity)

Silently the starlight disappears within the daylight.
I remember the dreams we outlined. It wasn’t right,
That’s what you say but I couldn’t shine in your light.

Don’t turn back to say sorry just shine like always
Because that’s how I know that you’re still okay.

Faraway among the distant sky and outer space you radiate
Creating the elements, redefining the primeval architecture.
Will anything remain the same? Like a storm you fracture
The walls surrounding. Will we rebuild or just decimate?

The desolate distance in between filled with the frequencies
Of two wild beasts. Every heartbeat drags us closer
As we run apart but your gravity’s greater. I fall backwards
But get back up to deny this fate; The constellations, my chains.

Don’t turn back to say sorry just shine like always
Because that’s how I know that you’re still okay.

Out of sight yet the force of gravity holds onto me. If I ever wait
I’ll sink into the depths of you my twin star. Is it already too late?

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“I feel your heartbeat without you near.”

 

Question What’s Accepted

What if I want to just live on my own terms? Constantly as I grew up people always told me what I should do. Their insights were never wrong but nothing I could ever follow. I’m not saying I plan on being anything new or great. I’ll be the best me I can be and nothing else. When humans try being more than they are they make mistakes and can hurt someone else. That’s no way for me to repay this life I’ve received and my friends.

Maybe I give into my doubt due to fear that I’d lose myself by climbing the rungs of life. The more we gain the more we forget about where we began. How does anyone move forward with that? By believing what awaits them will be better. I no longer believe that things will ever get better and still I saw I look toward tomorrow. That’s just because I only live to see tomorrow even if everything good fades away. Most others dismiss my feelings as depression.

I feel truly alive and great. The reality of any situation shouldn’t stop anyone from living. I wish I could say everything will be alright but life has always been a gamble. High risk and high reward. I’m no betting man I can’t put everything on the line because I have things left to do. Does the path I walk have any neon lights? No. I don’t know what the things I have left to do are either. Truthfully a lot of time wasted thinking about what I’m after.

Life should be lived and cherished for the miracle it is. Nothing should be more grand than the existence we crawl into. But humanity lies to itself about progress in an attempt to further wealth. Tell me, is life all about serving those who control through wealth, power, and manipulation? The simple lives aren’t at fault. What’s at fault is human greed. People complain about the petty things but that divides the whole human race further while the wealthy gain from our pain. Sounds like I’m saying we should bet everything against them. . .I’m not. We need to live our lives and show that we will never give up.

Where the Mists Began

The Mists, what is it? I guess the material that makes up consciousness. It’s something constantly changing but represents the concept of self. The self is not a certainty. People find who they are through their experiences. A blank canvas represents the Mists and life’s experiences represent the colors of paint on a palette. What they paint; what they become doesn’t matter as long as they live.

I thought of the Mists because I’ve always questioned bloodshed over beliefs. Many times beliefs weren’t at fault but used by others with bigger agendas. But what of the ones who believed in what they did? It’d be very cruel if one set of beliefs held credibility while others didn’t. Without certainty I created the concept of the Mists to move people from a narrow mindedness. Will others follow? Probably not. The contingency of humanity doesn’t gain much from working together against those with bigger agendas. They’re better off believing everything they’ve been told because they’d lose a lot of their comforts. I can spout ideals all my life yet get nowhere with my dedication. Selfishness will undoubtedly lead humanity towards a pinnacle moment where survival and luxury collide.

At that point the Mists took on a new direction as the basis of a fictional story. During my leisure time throughout my high school day I fleshed out the tale. A tragic hero named Desnei conquered death only to find himself cleaning up the mess of a world teetering upon its destruction. His world mirrors the real world in some respects to humanity and how we too teeter upon our destruction. Through his efforts Desnei saved his world some time after sacrificing himself. Without going into too much detail he originally lived during a time where four major cities vied for supremacy despite on paper being united by a World Government.

Two of the cities openly assaulted each other causing many mass exoduses during their hostility. Desnei attempted fleeing with his fiance with a military caravan. They discovered the opposing regiment sent out genetically altered humans after the caravan. Either him or his fiance had to assist a few soldiers in distracting the enemy. Chivalrously Desnei accepted the task and promised he wouldn’t die there. The thing about promises is we sometimes can’t keep them because every step forward has a risk. A risk that we turn and run, we try and fail, or we win this bet. He died.

The Mists welcomed the young man’s consciousness as his body stopped functioning. A question he often struggled with in life displayed itself in a way he could easily relate to. Run away or face the truth? Many humans find themselves caught between these two routes. It’s easy living in one’s limited view of life but harder learning from the views of others. Although the choice decided during life might not be the best in death there’s another chance. Is one path right or wrong? Not entirely. People advance at their own pace. A closed-off view will be safer than exploring the unknown. Taking the step from safety towards uncertainty must be directed by the person living the life no matter how much time might be spent. Desnei stated a great response towards himself at this time:

“You have lived your life and died by a choice to help another live one more day. Will you live on believing everything is alright or face that you’re dead without her? It hurts, yeah it should. You’re upset for obvious reasons but a choice must be made. Look forward instead of behind.”

Ultimately he accepted the reality. The place he entered contained trillions of other consciousnesses existing. Some were good and some were bad. Others told him about the layout of the Mists, the rulers of certain isles, the Fog of Lethe, and so many remarkable things he never believed in. Desnei decided he’d set off towards the nearest ruler named Rintaen but discovered true unrest in the Mists. A large squirmish between men and men with wings erupted over trivial matters. After he made landfall one of the men with wings promptly tossed Desnei and his raft back into the Mists. Unsure what he messed up Desnei drifted between that isle and another until a mysterious man appeared. Kronos.

They talked about the Mists for a long time. Kronos explained that the isles share names with writings from multiple faiths. The two isles nearby deemed Heaven and Hell may have similarities with their religious equivalents but they aren’t the same. This Kronos convinced Desnei that he ferried separated lovers from these isles back together at a cost. Desnei asked him if love could bridge a way back to the real world. Kronos replied:

“Of course love can make that a desire but payment is the means by which I can reunite you with your loved one. I often gather small memories from those seeking love but you’d sacrifice much more. I can’t take all your memories or I’d release a monster into existence. What to do. . .oh wait, a deal that only the living could do. Us figments of the Mist don’t truly exist and because of that we can never enter where you came from. Let me use you for my bidding. I’ll smuggle you to a place where hope doesn’t exist so you can do what’s impossible there. Revive yourself.

If you can’t I’ll bring you back here. She’ll die eventually then you’ll both be reunited and I’ll take a few unnecessary memories. What do you have to lose? Desnei think about what could be done if you returned. You probably wonder others never returned but that’s because I didn’t exist back then. A certain difference in the combined consciousness conjured me. So, what would you do with your renewed life?”
“Cherish every second. I’ll do it.”

That single choice started Desnei down an entirely different route than if he waited. This is what the Rise of the First Blight teaches people. We’re all humans trying our best but sometimes we make foolish choices. Good or bad doesn’t matter because life can become very confusing with all the differing variables. The journey he began here will open a new way for many others, a new set of variables. As a story Rise of the First Blight can be described as daunting for it’s meant to be something that reminds humanity about who we are.

sa;bdry

Of Shadows and Flowers

A dozen or so shadows dance around a light.
They resemble the human form we all share
But somehow appear mystical. I watch in awe
As their carefree steps meet. Could I dare
To have what they do? Fears escaping sight.

I inch closer towards the light and tremble with visible anticipation
Showing in my movements, a path to my creation and destruction.

All the shadows are so pretty. Why can’t I be that way?
If I was a flower I’m one of those overused and left on graves
Because they’re only pretty when left to wither. The bells
Ring in the birth and death of everything they ever knew.
So how long will these flowers be beautiful? Withering
Away before they ever find their way. Yeah, I’m the same.

Watching the other flowers blossom from a distance;
The dancers reveling in the light. A form of self torture
Leaving me unsure that I even exist at all. What stance
Should I take if I’m the sickness craving for my own cure?

I start to inch away from the light and relinquish anticipation
From my movements, a path towards my self reconstruction.

Close my eyes and let go of what can’t be mine today.
I miss out on life by thinking about what can’t be changed.
It can’t be changed because what I have is my life
And I can’t take what isn’t mine. I’m simply a human being
Trying to find a way through life’s uncertainty. The light
Starts flickering until it’s gone and so are the shadows.

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So long did I envy what I couldn’t be until I saw what I truly was. . .

 

 

Take My Hand (Keep Your Heart)

To reach an impossibility one must first do the unexpected.
Take the things learned but then walk towards the unknown
Because no one knows what awaits there. Reach for the sky.
We all look for wings only to find that nothing changes.
A way away from this ordinary existence, a graveyard of hearts.

The undead never rise from their graves. We’re all stuck in standby
Wondering what could be but never is. Is that a place to live and die?

Asking myself what’s the point in this real world. . .rejected, forgotten;
Tears spent over numbness I can’t change; lives lost following others.
I say words of hope but my eyes have another goal in sight like tethers
Holding me suspended above an abyss – carefree hearts not yet rotten.

An abyss of stagnant life where everything withers and crumbles in the wind.
I climbed out of that in search of something more, something true,
Something sweet. Exiled from the normal world by my unchanging heart
I’m left to wander. I’ve seen other hearts flirting with the dark abyss
And find myself with words to say before they drown in that numbness.

“Don’t feel you have to fit in. You can just be you. Change if you must,
Change for those you love and trust. I’ve been there sinking in their words
Until the light of the Sun disappears. It’s scary like you’re drowning.
Take my hand if you aren’t sure. You’re not alone. There’s atoning
For the helplessness found within but first take my hand. Lay down swords,
Let your armor fall, forget the battle; calm down and let your worries rust.

We should let the bad degrade away. Don’t forget it but try to see the way
Everything falls into alignment. Just be yourself and with me you can stay.

I keep leading the way. Do I know for certain? No, I just can’t let others hurt
The way I did. We’ll fall from the graces of society but gain our hearts.
So if you want never conform and join me in building a life up from the dirt.”

Hands, A Path Towards Clarity

The colors of a gradient shift as they bleed from my heart.
Emotions silenced by the demons of who I couldn’t be.
They’ve returned stronger than ever before. To start
Anew I must dissolve all these colors that were never me.

By some chance the man you see won a game of survival,
No it was a race to ever be. We all got here by a little luck.
Watch the stars shine and follow your heart; don’t get stuck
Believing what others say. You’ll find a way, your reprisal.

I listened and fell down as the world kicked me in the stomach.
“I’m perfectly okay. It’s alright.” That’s the cry of a lost man!

Pushed myself further because I wanted to rise.
Bleeding my heart’s fill trying just to remember
That I’m stronger than this. On a cold December
Night I decided that giving up would be unwise.

Caught by the undertow of something larger than my existence
All I can do is swim back up. Every breath reminds us that hands
Are meant to be held not to hold grudges. We will never forget!

Never forget the human kindness that heals every wound made.
Fallen but not lost for I see the way. I can’t let myself just fade. . .

sa;bdry
Humanity must rise together. . .