A Promise & Hope

Carrying the heavy tombstone of my people on my back
I make this pilgrimage towards the ruins of a holy city.
My tired body heaves their weight towards the final rest
And from that point on I’ll be free. “Free from what?”

The teachings resonate inside, I’ve retained.
I can’t hold even a candle to the light shone
Upon the darkness known as uncertainty. Alone
I stand testament because my heart’s stained.

Every step I take is mine. The dead are gone
Yet, I remain here carrying their sins to atone.

Would it be so wrong to etch my own tale?
The lows and highs of a life I can call mine.
Was I just that easy to mislead with wine,
The sweet disguise of the lies they sail.

“But I don’t mind. I carry the weight like a candle
Guiding me through the darkness.” I silently cry.
The love in my heart can’t ever be snuffed out.
I’ve accepted that sometimes turning back is hard,
If not impossible; this is why I make the pilgrimage.

“Ring a bell if I ever should return home.
The world has left me alone just to roam
Until I find my place on the Earth’s loam.”

For love keep a promise, for change keep hope.
337bc8e90bd93d8d524c14ef030b3a4e

The Imprint of a Life

Echoing footsteps reside within the membrane of time,
Far away from this moment. The shadows dance before us
Creating eternity. We are replicated before we are decimated;
I came to see the human you were decay until every truss
Comes undone. Will we fall in the end? Erase this crime.

When I saw a rose I pondered the meaning not the reasoning
And conjured a chasm inescapable. What did you see then?
A stranger? I never felt number. Told to explore then lost
Everyone who couldn’t come this far. My lonely throne. . .

We walk forward upon the long road our hearts pave,
Rain or shine. Fate we’re forced into. My lonely grave. . .

Shifting shadows echo everything we’ve ever done.
Virtues and vices eternal; we are lost
Within the dark as our corpses frost,
We are found every second that we thaw in the Sun.

Running from the tide on our heels we change so much.
The future will drown us all eventually but we run.
We run because it is all we know and we’re out of touch.

Haunted by the skeletons of time I’ll fight my way
Through my own sepulcher until the very last day.
Magic_Sword_Wings_Tattoo_by_Nalavara

Tear Down the Wall Dividing Us

Waiting on the day I can breathe once again.
Choked on the fumes of existence and dreams,
I can”t breathe the same air as long as I remain
Living. Every time I try all I can hear are screams.

Is that the imprint left from mankind,
An inability to accept falling behind?

The idea that a wall exists dictating productive
From obsolete. Life should never be quantified
Yet, I still find my own heart to be quite ineffective
When the truth is seen: We’re divided not unified.

Trying my best they dissect and analyze.
We’re no longer trying to relate anymore.
This predatory game played only hurts us.

Don’t betray another for the lies you’ve been fed
For this world has seen much despair in our stead.

The Tempest

Retelling the tales of glory we once knew.
There was a time we loved but it flew. . .

Away.

A goodness inside faltered. Just stay,
Words that couldn’t bridge this chasm.
We used to fight against life’s illusions
Like heroes unafraid of anything. So, why?
What changed inside your gentle heart?
I will never know what wasn’t said.

These lines felt by each of us the same.
Dreams got shattered and we ran away.
Friends dragged out to these sea spray
Waters and depths; the day the tides came.

Fearless men now soaked and shivering cold
Never saw the storm. We did what we were told
But, the truth had vanished from our own hold.

I started a journey to unlearn the path
That led to this tempest. Seeking truth.

the-tempest-1886-1.jpg
The Tempest ~ Ivan Aivazovsky, 1886

 

Shifting Paradigms

A world I love for good and bad
Like the Sun and moon we watch
Every day. Every cell will attach
Creating all living things. I’m sad.
The endless beauty lost to a match
Destined to burn the canvas. A patch.
Temporary verdant, is all I ever had.

Will you ever see me just once?
I stay here watching you dance.

My true name remains unknown
But you know it. Say it to me again.
Human, a beast without a crown.

What I’m meant to be isn’t grand
Although, a majesty exists to be seen:
The gift of chance known as the Earth.
This is what I’m aiming to always see.
Existence. I find resistance from others
Bringing me to my knees. I’ll never beg!

Why force me into a lonely spiral?
Gripping to the ledge I remember
Everything I believe and love. November,
Harbinger of our frigid Winter crystal.

I thought we’d enter the blizzard’s fray
Without ill will but I saw you walk away.
There was a time I’d ask you to stay.

I’m caught in a shift from romanticism
And dark romanticism towards realism.


A romantic drowning in a world of realists. “Am I alone?” These three words echo in an empty space. Well there isn’t a point in self loathing when I know I’m different from the rest. I don’t fit the paradigm created by mankind. I have no desire to destroy or change it just observe. I’ll do what is necessary for a self-respectable life but nothing more. Lazy? Perhaps. Happy? Yeah. The difference is my life is based on the profound instead of the mundane.

treeinfourseasons

Eye to Eye with the Darkness

These days I’ve seen doves become ravens
Yet the grace remains in their flight. Hunger,
The difference between the good and the evil.

I watch from afar as death and injustice
Rest atop the apex of this epoch as deities.
My hands appear bloody in my dreams.

Their deaths stain both the lost and silent.
My heart tries but will never be resilient.

I call it a curse because I’m fearful of the truth I see.
Anchor myself in truth though I speak in allusions
For it hurts my soul to know. The world has illusions
That I never make friends with. Castoff in the sea.

If I end up drowning in all the blood spilled by the avaricious
Know I have no regrets for I could never close my own eyes.
54aa7a83afd0515f6dab3a3bc97121b8

To Learn

Sometimes I start feeling like the worst
When remembering catastrophes I created.
The good left desecrated. Flowers wilting
After they bloom. My heart rejects that time.

A time I didn’t know myself. You’re right,
I did terrible things and I can’t fix the past.
These memories sting but they won’t last
If my heart keeps beating to find the light.

No matter what I’ll be prepared for a fight
When it comes my way. Sorry, I failed you
Yet I call on that for the strength I’m lacking.

“I moved on.” The lie everyone says once in a while.
Nobody can forget what they gave just to see a smile.
Is that all gone? Regrets force us to change. (No denial!)
learning

The Dimetri Uterna (The Dimension of All)

Have you had regrets on a choice already made?
Most likely. You’ll feel that way once in a while
But people push pass that. Just as the Nile
Will never see Cleopatra again things will fade.

For now that’s what we can understand
But doesn’t make it true. Grains of sand
Aren’t aware of the desert but it does exist.
What are we unaware of? Don’t try to resist.

The unknown will always be a thick miasma
Filling our every breath with true brilliance.

Every choice has been exhausted. We burn like a wick
Inside a lantern to brighten the path cloaked in night.
Every shard of time frozen, eternally awaiting ascension
Of consciousness, bathes the dark path in an afterglow.
All the timelines converge to grant us clairvoyance.

Falling into the Dimetri Uterna once more.
Before existence it was full of darkness
But no longer. The light heals every sore
Life created. We’ll reach our own potential.

The unknown will always be a thick miasma
Filling our every breath with true brilliance.

There is no telling what awaits beyond here and now
Even with all the blind faith in the world. As the crow
Flies we push onward to survive even if we do fly low.

Don’t let that be all you do. A glorious universe
Blesses everything with radiation from gamma rays
Released in the death of giant stars. Nothing stays
For long but the moments echo their own verse.

Can you hear them? The undead memories
Of a dying Universe refusing to disappear.
A Universe that never wanted to be alone
Created us all. Can you hear the happiness?

As we stare at the stars in the sky we’ll remember
How little we actually are then enter our slumber.
falcon

The Unseen Chains / Comfortless

Thinking about the reasons for existence. I have always known that the point of existence is to exist but, what if there’s more to it? All the choices end up painting an image of existence. The truth in that should be enough for comfort. I can’t find the comfort because something feels off. A monumental tower of questions stands in my path.

I enter the gates of the tower and hear them close behind me. This pilgrimage of mine leaves me hollow and ragged. The voices of gods and men matter not when I delve further into the uncertainty. Every second that passes ultimately leaves me further behind everyone else. I still remember the first question.

“Do you see life as a race or a journey?”
54aa7a83afd0515f6dab3a3bc97121b8t.

Never Let This Fade Away

Grand schemes direct the mannequins
Like an orchestra. Sent to chase the light,
Can they see their folly in denying a gift?
I’m not unlike them with all these sins.

We have all let others down in the past
And maybe today as well. I won’t say
Any excuses because this is the way it is
If we never push away from what we know.
The faith given to me melted away as snow
When this Winter ends. Seasons in this
Mind of mine follow no set rules. Decay
Eternalized. I search for a Spring to last.

A place where life never ends. My fantasy
Translates into a dream eternal. I shiver
From the icy betrayal of life, a dagger
In my back. How do I say forever this easy?

I knew nothingness before life. How can there be more?
Let these memories remain if anything. To God I swore.

The things I forget are many. Will her face fade away?
Tears fall from my eyes for I’m afraid to lose this.
Sinful is my heart aching in hunger of the truth
As it rips asunder the world I know. Am I even alive?

I knew nothingness before life. How can there be more?
Let these memories remain if anything. To God I swore.

Neuroses plague me as a flock of demons circling like vultures.
I’m far beyond Heaven and Hell now. Light is the carefree mind,
Darkness is the cloudy mind; the primal forces are my chains.

I’ll love with this heart and fear with this mind.
A chaotic existence I live to see events rewind
Because I want to see that smile. A strong wind
Inside carries me forward. . .I can’t fall behind.
eternity